Trust Your Children to Learn – Unschooling Life

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One of the hardest things, when joining the unschooling world, is learning to trust your children. How will they learn the fundamentals? Trust them.

• How will they learn to read?
• How do you know if they can read well?
• Do they learn to do the basics like math, reading, and writing?
• Are you ruining their chance for success?
• How will they adapt when they go to university?
• How will they learn to multiply without memorizing the times table?

Some of the most common questions I get, as an unschooling parent, are about how my children will learn.  These questions are even more frequent when I tell them that we do not use a curriculum or have sitdown lessons and workbooks.

There seems to be this common misunderstanding that learning can only take place within certain restrictions…

• Math can only be done out of a textbook
• Reading can only be taught by a trained professional.

This misconception, that these things need to go hand in hand, is simply a matter of not knowing better.  If you grew up believing that learning had to take place within the four walls of the classroom, it is easy to see how you could overlook the abundance of learning opportunities outside those restrictions.

The answer to all of these questions is simple…

Trust Your Children.

Without getting into the finer details about our personal approach to unschooling, as I have many videos on that topic, I want to let you know that your children WILL learn.

They will learn at their own pace and using their own interests.

Humans are born with this innate desire to learn.   It is built into our DNA to learn from the environment and people around us.  From the moment we are born, we are learning.  We are inquisitive creatures who want to understand the world around us.  All it takes from parents is a willingness to look beyond what is thought of as traditional learning.

We have an innate desire to endlessly learn, grow and develop. We want to become more than what we already are. Once we yield to this inclination for continuous and never-ending improvement, we lead a life of endless accomplishments and satisfaction.

Chuck Gallozzi

Opening Your Eyes

The concept known as deschooling is an interesting one.

Deschooling, a term rooted in the beliefs of Ivan Illich, is the shift from a traditional, government-influenced institution of schooling to a less-restricted method of learning that focuses on being educated by one’s natural curiosities.

Wikipedia

Deschooling is often thought of as an adjustment period a child takes when shifting from a traditional school system to a more free learning, unschooling, approach. But deschooling does not only refer to children – we, as parents, often need to deschool as well.

We need to unlearn the ideas about how people are able to learn. We need to rediscover the natural curiosity and enthusiasm for learning. Allowing ourselves, as parents, to rediscover the enthusiasm we want our children to have will benefit everyone involved.

The Duck Says “Quack”

When I first became a parent, I believed that I HAD to teach my child. I didn’t think that they would learn without me showing them how to do so. From the moment my eldest was born, this idea was forced upon me. I had to teach him to latch properly to be able to breastfeed (which is not always true, by the way). Lacking trust in my child and trust in myself to be the best mom I could be held me back from my true desires.

I was encouraged to tell my baby the rubber duck is yellow. A duck says quack. We have ONE duck. Forcing information into my child’s brain from the moment they were born.

But what I quickly realized, was that my children would figure this out all on their own. I didn’t need to tell him at all hours of the day that the cow said “moo”. Instead, I started embracing trust. I watched him discover the world around him and ask questions and learn. The passion and curiosity flowed from his spirit.

I had discovered the concept of unschooling (or life long learning) by the time my second child was born. I also discovered parents talking about unschooling from birth and letting your children learn at their own pace.

Let me know in the comments if you would like to know about unschooling from birth. I would gladly write more on the subject.

Learn At Your Own pace

By trusting in them, trusting their own timeline, children are able to learn and explore at their own pace.

Learning begins the moment we are born and will continue throughout of lives if we trust and embrace the process. My children are no longer learning basic colours and animal sounds. Learning those concepts happened at their own pace.

Advancing to other concepts and ideas that capture their attention, they learn as much as they can until their curiosity and desire to learn more on the subject is fulfilled. It is amazing the wide array of interests a child will have if you let them be themselves and explore their inner desires.

Learning The Basics

Another amazing trait of humans is the desire to be independent. To be able to learn independently, they will have a desire to learn the basics. Through this curiosity and thirst for independence, they also discover the basics of learning. Reading, writing, and math are all interwoven into the fabric of life and learning.

Does this mean I do not teach my children and let them figure it out on their own?

Not at all.

I spend a lot of my time and energy each day answering questions and helping them in their learning process. I trust them to ask me for help when they need it. But I do not always wait for them to ask, I am always willing to offer a helping hand or a partnership on their adventure to discover new information.

I have also learned to embrace my own curiosity. My eldest child, who is 10 years old, is currently very interested in space, topic I have always found interesting. Together we learn about the cosmos and the solar systems. His passion ignites a fire within me and together we learn about the endless possibilities of the universe.

Together we explore concepts well beyond his grade level – astrophysics and theoretical physics. Advanced mathematics that are a little advanced for both of us but intriguing and spurring on the learning process.

So now I ask you, are you ready to trust? Trust yourself to be the best parent you can be and to trust your child to learn?